


Happy (Insano) Valentine's Day

by QueenofSchmoop



Series: Insano Dating 'verse [6]
Category: Atop the Fourth Wall, That Guy with the Glasses/Channel Awesome, The Spoony Experiment
Genre: Anal Sex, Barebacking, Brief reference to past traumatic events, Established Relationship, Humor, Light Angst, M/M, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Romance, Schmoop, Skinny Dipping, Threats of Bodily Harm, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-04
Packaged: 2018-12-23 21:56:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11998740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenofSchmoop/pseuds/QueenofSchmoop
Summary: Spoony pulls a prank close to Valentine’s Day. It leads to one of the best Valentine’s Day dates either Linkara or Insano ever had.





	Happy (Insano) Valentine's Day

Linkara thought about ignoring his ringing phone but he needed a break from editing his newest video anyway. He reached out and grabbed the sleek thing. “Hello?”

“Linkara! You gotta help me!”

“Spoony?” He was standing in a flash, half turning to grab his magic gun. 

“Yeah. Oh shit, Doc, put it down!”

Linkara stopped. “Doc? Spoony, what’s going on?” He asked, suspiciously. 

“It’s Insano. He’s going to kill me!”

“No he isn’t. He doesn’t kill people anymore. Unless they have it coming, I guess,” he added. 

“He obviously thinks I do!” Spoony made a small noise. “Dammit, those were my pants!”

Linkara held back a snicker. “Tell me what you did.”

“Nothing! It was just a harmless prank.”

He covered his face with one hand. Oh, that wasn’t good. “Spoony,” he drew the name out, “what exactly did you do?” Then he corrected himself. “No, never mind, just put me on speakerphone.” 

“Sure. Maybe you can stop your boyfriend from roasting me. After all, I’m just the guy who lets him live here.” A sound, a scrape of movement. “Hey, Doc, someone wants to talk to you.”

“It can wait,” he heard Insano’s voice. “First I must enact my revenge! With SCIENCE!”

“Insano!” Linkara shouted, hoping Spoony was holding the phone in a way the doctor could hear him. “It’s me, Linkara!”

He could practically hear the record scratch. 

“Linkara?”

“Yeah. Um, could you not kill Spoony?”

“Why is that phrased as a question?!” Spoony demanded to know.

“Shut up,” both Linkara and Insano said together, then Insano’s voice got much nearer. 

“Did he tell you what he did?”

“No. Just said it was a prank.”

“A prank. Yes. Oh ha ha,” he said in a deadpan voice. “Hilarious.”

“Insano, what did Spoony do?” Linkara was envisioning scenarios. 

“”I’m not sure I can say.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake! All I did was turn his lab coat pink. Threw a red shirt in with it and it turned pink. That’s all. You’d think I cut off his hand or something.”

Silence. 

Then Linkara--”you dyed his lab coat pink?”

“It was a prank!”

“It wasn’t because tomorrow’s Valentine’s Day?” Linkara asked. 

“…Tomorrow’s Valentine’s Day?” Spoony asked. 

“Yes.”

“Oh. Um, no. That wasn’t why. I just saw the red shirt and his coat sitting there and…okay, it was stupid. But I don’t think I deserve to die for it.”

“I wasn’t going to actually kill you,” Insano said in disgust. “Merely make you suffer a little.”

“Cause that sounds so much more fun,” Spoony snarked. 

“Insano, no hurting Spoony. I’m sure he’s sorry for what he did and will do everything he can to fix it.”

“Yeah! That. You bet.”

Linkara heard Insano snort derivatively. “I suppose what I’ve already done is enough.”

“What you’ve already done? You mean chasing me around the house, pointing some fiendish device at me?”

“This?” Linkara could almost see some tech thing being waved around. “This is the device I invented to get the red out of the coat and turn it pristine again.”

A pause. “That’s not a weapon?”

“No.”

“Then, what did you do to me?”

Linkara could practically hear Insano smiling. “I turned every single one of your games into Ultima 9.” Another pause. “Oh, stop screaming! It’s only temporary. It will fade. In a few days.”

Linkara raised his eyebrows. “Wicked, Doc.”

“Teach him to mess with my lab coat,” Insano said. 

“I dunno. I always thought you’d look good in pink. And it is fitting for the holiday.”

A silence then, “you think so?”

“Maybe you should leave it that color and let me judge for myself.”

“Oh good,” Spoony’s voice came from further away. “You guys turn this into a kinky sex thing while I go weep over my games.” 

They ignored him. “I’ll be right over,” Insano said. A second later, he blinked in, with his wrist teleported. Sure enough, he was wearing his lab coat and it was a soft pink color. He also happened to be wearing his goggles. That was a big clue that he’d been seriously angry. Linkara knew that he never would have really hurt Spoony. Not now, knowing that it would drive Linkara away. 

He stepped over to the scientist. “So that’s it, huh?”

“Yes. I should have fricasseed him for it.”

“I would have thanked him, myself.” Seeing the surprised look, he went on. “You look downright adorable in that.”

Dr. Insano actually blushed. “Adorable?” He stammered. 

“Yep. Adorable. Kissable. Lovable. Cute.” He stepped closer, invading Insano’s personal space, then reached up and lifted the goggles off. He pulled him in and kissed him sweetly. 

When they separated, Insano coughed. “Perhaps I was a bit too hasty about--” he was cut off by another kiss. “You really like it?”

“Not all the time. You wouldn’t be you without the white lab coat. But it makes a nice change of pace. Maybe you could dye your coat different colors for holidays,” he suggested. “And it does bring a rosyness to your cheeks.”

Insano obviously didn’t know how to respond to that. Linkara let him try to figure out for a few moments, then went back in for another kiss. They were still kissing when 90’s Kid appeared from around the corner. 

“Duuuuuuuuuude! Not radical! I don’t want to see that!”

Linkara parted from his boyfriend with a sigh. “Was there something you needed, 90’s Kid?”

“I was just coming to tell you that I won’t be here tomorrow night. There’s an excellent party for all of us guys who don’t happen to have dates for the holiday. I’ve been invited. It should be excellent!”

“I see. Thanks for letting me know.”

“Sure. Carry on with your macking.” He waved a hand as he walked away. 

He saw Insano open his mouth and shook his head. He was about to lean back in when he heard Harvey’s voice. 

“Kid? You in here?”

With a small sigh, Linkara answered, “I’m here. With Insano.”

Harvey came in anyway. “Ah, good. Just wanted to let you know that I got a hot date tomorrow night. This blonde named Trixie I met at the club. I don’t think I’ll be back until morning, if you know what I mean.”

Insano rolled his eyes. “No, could you be more blatant with your innuendos?”

Linkara rubbed a hand against Insano’s back. “Thanks for letting us know, Harvey. Have a good time on your date.”

“Thanks. Um, you too, kid.” He walked away. 

After a moment, Linkara said, “I would kiss you again but we’d just get interrupted.”

“We would?”

Linkara nodded. “We still haven’t heard from--” suddenly Dr. Linksano appeared, “him.”

“Good, you’re both here! I wanted to--”

“Let us know you have plans for tomorrow night,” Linkara said, cutting him off. 

“Well, yes. I was going to spend the evening with a…friend.” He tugged at the collar of his suit. 

“Why is everyone coming in and telling you their plans for tomorrow night?” Insano wanted to know. 

“Thank you for the information, Linksano. Have a good time.” He turned. “I don’t know why, Insano. I guess to keep us informed?”

“Ha!” Linksano laughed. 

“Something I say funny?” Linkara asked, turning back to him.

“You really don’t know? The reason we’ve all been telling you our plans for Valentine’s Day?”

“Enlighten us. Please.” He gestured. 

“It’s so you know you’ll have the place to yourselves tomorrow night. We don’t know what your plans are, you haven’t said and that’s fine. Some of us don’t really want to know,” he muttered. “But this way you know that the coast is clear, as it were.”

Linkara stood there for a minute then exploded. “That’s crazy! And stupid! And crazy! What, you guys think Insano and I are just going to have hot, sweaty naked man sex in the living room?”

“Well, there was that one time--”

“I thought we agreed never to mention that again!” Linkara shouted, not wanting to be sidetracked. “And Insano invented the noise suppressors and put them all around the place. You guys don’t have to clear out for fear of hearing things.”

“We just feel it would be better all around. You two can get….enthusiastic.”

Insano giggled. “That’s mostly Linkara’s doing.”

“Not helping, Insano,” Linkara said as an aside. He heaved a sigh. “All right. Well, it’s not necessary but thanks for clearing out.”

“You’re welcome. Just as a matter of scientific curiosity, what are your plans for the holiday?”

Linkara and Insano looked at each other. “I have a plan,” they both said together. “You do?” Again, they spoke in unison. 

“I think that’s my cue.” Linksano left. 

“Maybe we should compare plans? I mean, to see if we’re at cross purposes?”

“I wanted to surprise you. But all right. I had intended to use my teleported to take you to Paris, where I made reservations at a fine restaurant. Then I had thought we’d take a walk through the city. A bit cliché but clichés are just those for reasons. You?”

“I was planning on using Comicron One’s teleporters to send us to the beach. We’d have a picnic supper and watch the sun go down and then maybe go for a moonlight swim. Swimsuits optional.”

“That…sounds pretty good.” 

Linkara smiled. “Yours sounds good too. Hey, maybe we can combine them? Get that food in Paris, bring it to a French beach and eat it there, then go for a swim.”

“France is in a different time zone. We’d be there in the daylight if we went tomorrow night.”

“Then let’s go now.”

“Now?”

“Why not? Give me a few minutes and I can get ready.”

Insano looked at him, then nodded. “Very well. I have to pop back to the lab. My wallet’s there. I’ll be back in a few.” He disappeared. 

A few minutes later, Linkara was standing and waiting. He’d taken care of everything, he hoped. He’d passed the word to the guys, had Nimue beef up security since he’d be gone a while, and told Pollo to take some time off. Insano teleported back in. 

“All right, I think I’ve got everything I need. I see you have supplies as well.”

“Thought we might need some of this,” he said, hefting the hamper. 

“Very clever, I’m sure.” Insano bussed him on the lips and then put his arm around Linkara. “To Paris!” They rematerialized on a busy street, just up the block from the restaurant. It was nighttime and people were everywhere. Insano led Linkara up the eatery. 

After a bit of confusion, they got their food to go and then Linkara took over, having Nimue find co-ordinates for a secluded beach. He used the ship to beam them over. It was empty of all but a few scattered couples. They spread their blanket and Insano began unpacking the food. Though Linkara was still on American time, which meant he was more in the mood for lunch, he ate heartily. Insano too. 

“I’m sorry you didn’t get your sunset,” Insano said, as they sat, shoulders touching. 

“It’s okay. That’s the great thing about sunsets. They happen once a day, every day. So if you miss one there‘s always another.” 

Insano let out a soft laugh. “Your boundless optimism is truly amazing.”

Linkara put his head on Insano’s shoulder. “You say the sweetest things.”

They sat there, listening to the crash of the waves, enjoying the cool night air. After a time, Linkara got up and clapped his hands. “Swimming?”

Insano looked around. The beach was now empty. “All right.” Together, they both began to remove their clothes. When they were both nude, they ran for the water. Splashing around playfully, Linkara swam up to Insano and put his arms around his neck. “If I kissed you right now, would your lips taste like saltwater?” 

“One way to find out.”

Linkara smiled and pulled their bodies together. He titled his head, then sent out his tongue, seeking the taste of Insano’s lips. He pulled back and whispered, “you do,” then went back in for a full kiss. They bobbed there in the water, kissing under the stars. Linkara lost his balance as a wave hit them and he nearly went under. “Maybe we should move this?”

Insano nodded. They turned and swam for shore. As they got out of the water, the cold hair hit them both and Linkara started to shiver. The scientist tapped his wrist comm--he had, of course, made it waterproof--and suddenly a strange machine popped in out of nowhere. He set if off to the side of blanket and pushed a few buttons. Almost instantly the air around them heated up. 

“New invention?” 

“I whipped it up. It’s a heater of sorts. It uses--” He was cut off as Linkara tackled him to the blanket, kissing him fiercely. 

“You are so damn incredible.” It was said forcefully but with an underlying affection. 

“It’s just a heater. You were cold.”

“I was,” Linkara agreed, then ground his body down on his lover’s. “I’m warming up. Rapidly.”

Insano raised an eyebrow. “That was terrible.”

“Was it?” He pressed his lips to Insano’s neck. “I could have said worse.”

“Oh?” Insano’s voice was higher than even it normally was. 

“I could have said that you make me hot. That you make me burn. That my love for you is like a raging fire. That--” Insano flipped them over, kissing him for a very long time. “I’ve got more,” Linkara laughed. 

“I’m sure you do. But I’d rather do other things besides talking.”

“Would you?” 

They rolled around on the blanket, sometimes into the sand a bit, kissing and touching. Once again Insano ended up on top, Linkara below him. The reviewer looked up and gasped. 

“What?”

Linkara couldn’t speak. He was gazing up, the stars shining behind Insano, framing him so perfectly it took his breath away. “You’re beautiful,” he said, voice soft with awe. 

Insano froze then cut his eyes away. He still had trouble handling compliments, even from Linkara. Especially about his looks. 

Hands came up and cupped his face. “Hey. You’re _beautiful_ ,” Linkara said again. “I…can I have you like this?”

Insano was confused. “What?”

“I want you like this. I know that means you do the work but…,” he trailed off. 

Insano got it. “You want that?”

“Yes. If you’re not comfortable with it--” He was cut off by Insano climbing off him. Shit, Linkara thought, he’d ruined this. Then he frowned. “What are you doing?”

“Looking for the lube. You did pack some, right?”

“On the left. You’re okay with…?”

“Riding you like a pony?” Insano said, looked back over his shoulder, a grin on his face. “I am so okay with that, you don’t even know.”

Linkara’s cock, already hard, twitched. He resisted temptation to just pull Insano back to him. Abruptly Insano yelled, “ah ha!” and brandished the tube like it was the Holy Grail itself. He scrambled back and sat down on Linkara’s waist, handing it over. 

The reviewer could hardly think well enough to even open it, as Insano looked pretty as a picture again. Also, his ass was literally in Linkara’s lap. He had a sudden flash of Insano giving him a lap dance and squeezed the lube so hard it nearly burst. He drew in a deep breath, trying to calm down, only to see Insano looking down with a smug smile.

“Turn you on that much, eh?”

“You always do,” Linkara admitted. “But you are particularly lovely tonight.”

“Make me sound like a Disney Princess, why don’t you?” Insano groused but underneath that he actually sounded pleased. 

“We sure as hell ain’t keeping things G rated,” Linkara said, finally getting the cap off. He maneuvered his hand and was about to part the cheeks but then he remembered Insano’s frequent complaints about the lube being cold. He was about to rub his fingers together to warm them up when Insano took hold of his wrist and guided him to the spot. 

“The lube is plenty warm from being next to the heater.” It was like he’d read Linkara’s mind. 

The reviewer slipped his finger inside and watched Insano’s body rock once. He stared, spellbound, at the sight above him. Insano’s eyes wide, his luscious locks stirring in the breeze, his body taut. The heat was starting to make them sweat a little and there was now a sheen on their flesh. Linkara’s other hand was on Insano’s hip and he realized how tightly he was gripping there. He quickly rubbed at the spot and slid his hand down the thigh. 

The doctor looked down at him. “Maybe I should blindfold you so you’ll stop getting distracted by my looks?”

“No!” It came out much louder than Linkara intended. 

“I wasn’t serious,” Insano said, bending awkwardly down. “Though if you ever want to do anything kinky, all you have to do is ask.” Then he let out a noise of distress as Linkara pulled his finger free. Quickly followed by a sharp, but happy, exhale as two fingers plunged inside him. He was pulling them out, getting ready for three when he heard the snap of the lube. He looked and saw Insano pouring some on his own hand and then bringing it down to Linkara’s cock. 

“What are you doing?”

“Getting you ready.”

“But--”

“Linkara, trust me. I know my own limits.”

He paused then met those gorgeous green eyes. He nodded. “I trust you.” He watched a very sweet smile crease those lips, that then turned absolutely filthy as Insano coated his cock. 

Practically bending in half--and who knew that Insano was that flexible?--the doctor kissed him hard. Then he raised his hips and guided Linkara’s hardness to the right spot. 

“Easy!” Linkara said. “Don’t hurt yourself.”

“Relax.” He breathed and slid down at a steady pace until Linkara was fully sheathed within him. Then he sat perfectly still. Opening his eyes again, he looked down. “Linkara?”

He had his eyes shut tight, biting down on his bottom lip. “Yes?” He asked, voice strained.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m trying not to come right this second,” Linkara admitted. 

Insano let out a surprised laugh, which rocked both of their bodies with vibrations. “Really?” He sounded pleased. 

“Really. I don’t know what I can do or say to convince you how much you turn me on. How much I love you, love making love with you.”

Touched, Insano reached out his hand and pulled the bottom lip out from the teeth. “I’m sorry. It’s just…”

“I know.” And he did. Insano hadn’t told him details but he knew the bare bones. He ran one caressing hand over Insano’s hip, then cupped his cock. 

The doctor let out a noise and rocked. It was off beat at first and then he found a good rhythm, bouncing up and down. Linkara timed his hand to Insano, both speeding up by unspoken agreement. Finally the rhythm fell apart and Insano tossed his head back, hair shaking all around his face. 

“Insano,” Linkara gasped the name out.

The scientist knew what he meant. “Do it. Come.” 

And Linkara did. As he did, he registered Insano also climaxing, spattering him on his chest. He had the presence of mind to wait then let Insano climb off him. The man all but collapsed on the blanket beside him. 

“I think we’re going to need another dip in the water.”

He laughed weakly. “Maybe in a week when I can move my limbs again.”

Insano sat up, leaning on one elbow. “If you like I can invent a device that--” He was cut off as Linkara pulled him down and kissed him for a very long time. “Or not,” he said when they finally broke apart. 

They lay there for a bit then Linkara made a face. “Okay, this is starting to feel a little gross.” He pushed himself up and then gave Insane a hand too. They waded into the water, not really swimming, just bobbing around. 

“Good Valentine’s Day?” Insano asked.

“Very good. But technically the holiday isn’t until tomorrow. Well, in the States.” He got a fiendish look in his eyes. “And everyone’s going to be gone,” he mused. 

Insano merely raised his eyebrows and then smiled suggestively. 

“I do still have to give you your gift.”

“You got me a gift?” Insano sounded very surprised. 

“Sure. It’s Valentine’s Day. You’re supposed to buy something for the person you love. Wait, I don’t mean it’s required--” he started to gesture. 

Insano leaned in and put his hand over Linkara’s mouth. “Glad I’m not the only one, then.”

“Really?” Linkara said, though it was a bit muffled by the hand. 

“You’ll see tomorrow night.”

Turning fully into Insano’s body, he pressed close and hugged him. “Can’t wait.” 

 

End

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know if I should change/add to the tags.


End file.
